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Thursday, October 06, 2005

 

Why cats are much better than dogs


We are told it's a dog-eat-dog world, and I for one am prepared to believe it. That is the trouble with the world: it is just too doggone doggy. A bad play is a dog. A slow horse is a dog. An ugly woman is a dog. (Paradoxically, as well as parenthetically, a sharp-tongued woman may be either a bitch or a cat, which in my opinion is a perfect example of catachresis.)

A dog's life is short and insipid, but everyone knows that a cat has nine lives. Indeed, there is something positively redemptive about cats. For example: a dog town is a place to try out a play that might be a dog, but even a dog of a play could be improved by the addition of a suitable catastrophe.

Dogs know their catechisms and are easy to categorize, but cats sit cater-wumpus to the world, defying dogma.

No one in his right mind wants to go to the dogs. The dog house is a place where naughty boys are sent--the same naughty boys who go willingly to a cat house.

A cat may be a prostitute, but all dogs, with regard to their masters, are sycophants.
For a dog-like devotion is blind, but the cat-eyed lover sees in the dark.

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